Don't Worry, Get Moving

My Dad recently had major back surgery and I didn’t know how much it would affect me. I didn’t realize I was worried about him until the day of the surgery when I felt distracted and anxious. My father is not as young as he once was (none of us are) so I think it weighed on me differently than I expected.

When I felt those feelings on the day of the surgery, I had to think about what was bothering me. Pinpointing the reason for my angst helped a bit. Doing something about it was out of the question, I am not a surgeon after all.

Since I live too far away from the hospital to make it worth going to see him, I would wait until he was home to visit him. My sister was able to help out and shuttle him from the hospital. My mom was busy making the house ready for him to maneuver carefully with his walker while he heals. I felt powerless and helpless when all I wanted was to do something. So once he was home, I made a meal and went over to help with whatever might need to be done.

When a big life event like this occurs, people want to feel like they can help. We want to DO something. This is why we make meals, we send flowers, we go help with small tasks. It helps to alleviate the worry.

As the saying goes, “Worrying does not take away tomorrow’s troubles, it takes away today’s peace.” You’ve likely heard this before because man, is it true.

When I was a little girl, I had a tiny bag of Trouble Dolls. There were 6 miniature hand made dolls no bigger than my pinky. I recently remembered these dolls and gave them to my son to use because he is a worrier. The Guatemalan tradition is to tell your troubles to the dolls and they will work on them while you’re sleeping so that you don’t have to worry. The little paper inside the bag says there are only 6 dolls so you are only allowed 6 troubles.

Some people pray, some people give their worries to the universe… Whatever works to free your mind of the clutter that worry creates.

More than just speaking your troubles and worries to some entity to get it off your mind, doing something, anything, will also help you feel better.

To add to my worries the week of my father’s surgery, I found out that my son could possibly have food allergies. The combination of both worries had me spiraling. I allowed myself to feel my feelings (read: ugly cry) and then I got myself together and made some appointments. I had a game plan and stopped catastrophizing the situation. It helped immensely just to be in action around these scary things that loomed in the unknown.

Taking some small steps toward a goal will make you feel less helpless. A small step could be making a meal for people who are overwhelmed with life events, making a phone call to set up an appointment, writing a page or even a paragraph for your book, setting up a meeting with your boss to talk about your advancement in the company.

When things get worrisome, use your Trouble Dolls, pray to your God, ask the universe for guidance…. And then get moving.